Hello Beautiful Friends! I hope your week is ever so lovely so far. And if it’s absolutely the worst week ever, then know that it’s going to get better. Actually last week I had to tell that to myself over and over… You know when you’re just kind of down in the dumps and it’s hard to understand why, but also hard to shake it off? It’s not really sadness, it’s more just a deep distress… I was reading today about distress, what causes it in people. A synonym for the word was also sorrow and I thought that was interesting because I never thought of those too things as similar. Sorrow is a really funny thing, I think. It’s not loud like anger, it’s not as weepy as sadness, it’s not as bitter as disgust, it isn’t as obvious as fear. No, it’s a silent ninja of an emotion. Sorrow sneaks up on you, it comes as casually as blue melody we hum on our lips. It hangs around until it turns into a weight that’s too heavy to bear. Let’s be honest, especially as women – we’re not happy rainbow unicorns all the time. Sometimes we’re disappointed, sometimes we feel overlooked. Sometimes sorrow hangs around us and we don’t even realize it until that moment it all hits you at once. We get busy and we get exhausted, so instead of reading the word before bed we scroll through our friend’s (and kylie jenner’s) snapchat story, rub some lavender on our feet and fall asleep to the gentle TV laughter of Jimmy Fallon. We do this night after night until one day we’re agitated, worn out and annoyed at everything. I know you know what I’m talking about! And we wonder WHY! “Why am I feeling unfulfilled? Where did my joy go?” I don’t know about you, but it’s usually at these moments when I feel the most sorrow. There’s not one thing you can pinpoint that upset you, it’s a series of little cuts and bruises and exhaustions that add up to one wound. I’ve learned to ask myself… What am I doing day to day to recognize the goodness of God? What am I doing Monday – Saturday that steadies my heart? What do I do at the end of the day to lay down the little sorrows and pick up His big Joy? This may mean nothing to you, but I know for some of us this means a lot… Every time I feel the weight of life I think of these words:
“Why should I feel discouraged, Why should the shadows come, Why should my heart be lonely, And long for heaven, heaven and home, When, when Jesus is my portion, My constant Friend is He; Oh, oh-oh, his eye is on the sparrow, And I know He watched, watched it over me.
I sing because I’m happy
I sing because I’m free
For His eye, his eye is on the sparrow, And I know, I know He watches over me.”
Why do you sing? Because you know all of the words on the screen on Sunday morning? Do you sing because it’s your job as the worship leader? Do you sing so that other people can think that you’re okay when you’re really not? Or are you singing to lay those burdens down, that sorrow down, that rejection down? You need you need to know today that you’re being watched. TOTALLY non-creepy way. But you are being watched. You’re constantly protected every time you step inside of your car, that plane, that relationship. How comforting is that to know? This week I assessed why I sing. And you know what? My heart has been so heavy that my answer wasn’t even clear. But I sat down and I sang. Not because I had to. But because He makes me happy. Because He made me free! What a beautiful confidence that should give us! I want a generation of young women who live so SEEN that they GLOW. Sometimes all I need is to be reminded that He’s looking out for me! That He sees! That I’M seen! Every struggle, insecurity and issue we hide from the world isn’t hide-able from Jesus. He sees all of us and loves us anyway. He even loves the hidden corners of our soul where we store our sorrow. He loves you. He knows you! To the extent of which we can live so peacefully and filled that we can’t help but run over with beauty. Today I’ve been buried under piles of laundry, emails and emails, and I still need to grocery shop for dinner! But you know what? I’m happy. You know why? Because I’m filled. And sorrow doesn’t have a hold on me because I can recognize the truth of who I am, the beauty of my life and be grateful for it! When the enemy tries – and trust me he does try – I can combat every lie without blinking an eye because I’ve postured myself towards heaven. But I have to make choices to do that! I have to put my phone down, pick my Bible up. I have to turn Netflix off, turn my worship up. I have to assess my sorrow – what’s hurting me, what’s hindering me? Is it a circumstance or is it the state of my mind? Am I taking care of myself or does my to-do list have authority over my health? “Anyone who goes through me will be cared for—will freely go in and out, and find pasture. A thief is only there to steal and kill and destroy. I came so they can have real and eternal life, more and better life than they ever dreamed of.” John 10:9 Did you know that Jesus came not so you can just get by but He came for YOU to have a better life than you’ve ever dreamed of! He came for you to know you’re seen. He came so that you can sing in the midst of deep sorrow. I hope these words help you today, I sure did need them!
His eye is on the Sparrow, so how much more is He looking out for you? Sing today.